notadictionary.com
Je vais peter un câble j'ai dit à mon coiffeur fait moi cette coupe j'ai screen la coupe sur une vidéo ou jai mis pause et ce gros fdp il ma fait le logo play jvais l'enculer demain
→ “I'm about to lose my mind, I told my hairdresser 'do this cut for me', I screenshotted the cut from a video where I hit pause, and that big idiot gave me the play button logo, I'm going to fuck him tomorrow”
Je — I (subject pronoun)
vais — am going to (present tense, 1st-p. singular of aller)
peter — to blow / to explode → here, slang for losing one's temper
un câble — cable → idiomatically means 'temper' or 'nerves'
j'ai — I have (present tense, 1st-p. singular of avoir)
dit — said (past participle of dire)
à — to / at (preposition)
mon — my (possessive adjective)
coiffeur — hairdresser / barber (noun)
fait — do / make → here, imperative form telling someone to perform an action
moi — me (object pronoun)
cette — this (demonstrative adjective)
coupe — cut / haircut (noun)
j'ai — I have (present tense, 1st-p. singular of avoir)
screen — screenshot (loanword from English)
la coupe — cut / haircut (noun)
sur — on / upon (preposition)
une vidéo — video (noun)
ou — where / or (conjunction/adverb)
jai — I put / I have (contraction of je + ai; present tense, 1st-p. singular of mettre or avoir)
mis — put (past participle of mettre)
pause — pause (noun)
et — and (coordinating conjunction)
ce — this (demonstrative adjective)
gros — big / fat → here, used as insult meaning 'thick-skulled' or 'idiotic'
fdp — fils de pute → acronym for son of a bitch, very vulgar insult
il ma — made / did → past participle of faire with object pronoun 'me' attached
fait — done / made (past participle of faire)
le logo — logo (loanword from English)
play — play (loanword from English)
jvais — I'm going to (colloquial contraction of je vais)
l'enculer — to fuck him / to screw him → literal verb ending is -er, but here it's in infinitive after 'vais'; extremely vulgar threat
demain — tomorrow (adverb of time)
